Dear Vanilla Soy Milk,

Where, oh where, have you been all my life?

You make everything so much better.

Love,
Sam

Dear Yankees,

I just wanted to thank you for ending the World Series tonight. I've tried hard to be good about sharing my fiancé with you for the last few weeks but I'm really glad I don't have to anymore.

Oh yeah, and sorry about the whole not hopping on your bandwagon with the rest of the Kelly fam thing. Don't take it personally. Me and sports, in general, have historically misunderstood each other. But I do think it's safe to say that this could be the start of a beautiful say-hi-to-each-other-in-the-halls kind of friendship.

Love,
Sam

just some ways to manage your stress

Tonight during my class, bubbles and homemade Oreos were distributed to everyone. Then we watched Friends. No big deal.

"We never do stuff like this!"

I'm not one of those people who are suuuuuuper into Halloween. I don't think I've worn a Halloween costume since high school and only then because well, everyone else was doing it (booo peer pressure). Likewise, my family isn't the most festive of families. But this year, my cutest mom and little sister, Liz, went allll out and threw a cabin Halloween party to be remembered.

First, there was an art project: painting a huge banner to be sent to missionary sister Hailey on Thanksgiving.


If there's one thing you can count on my family always getting into, it's art.

Then we got in our costumes and snapped a bazillion pics of each other. We all kept saying, "we never do stuff like this!" So we wanted to be sure to document it a million times.

Love birds, Sarah and Mikey as a Spanish dancer and her parrot.

Rosie as Little Red Riding Hood and Archie as the sweetest Big Bad Wolf face.

Scarecrow Liz.

Mom as a train conductor (with handcuffs??). Seriously though, how cute is she!?

Dad as a mad doctor. I hate that weird mask.

And I saved the best for last.

If you weren't a member of the New York, Westchester II ward's Young Men/Young Women's group back in the day then you won't really understand the awesome-ness that is me and Chas's costumes.

It looks like the crazy witch doctor had a few more tricks up her sleeve and ended up snagging prince Tom-Tom.

After all the photos had been taken, we all kinda ended up slowly taking off our costumes, piece by piece. Maybe next year we'll actually wear them for more than a half hour. Baby steps. :)

Next, we all sat down to an amazing Halloween dinner done by mom and Liz.


Notice the spiders in the salad, the fangs in the chili, and the "mummy dog" with green relish ooze on top. My favorite was the butternut squash "bone head" skewer. Mmmm...

The night ended with watching an old Nancy Drew mystery movie. So much better than gross super scary movies. Who needs chainsaws and zombies when you can have a little girl skipping around the neighborhood and rescuing a kidnapped grandma?

I love my family.

good fortune

I woke up this morning to a very happy phone call. I got a job as an art therapist at the University of Utah Neuropsychiatric Institute! I know, right!? I still kind of can't believe it. It's just an on-call position to start but the hospital is doing a huge expansion in the spring and I was told that they would then be hiring more full-time therapists from the on-call peeps. So I figure this is the perfect way to ease myself into it all. And because I'm on-call, I get to work with the whole range of patients- from children all the way up to older adults (which will not only be great experience for me but will also look excellent on the resume). The other huge plus is that the head of the Expressive Therapies department will provide me with ATR (Art Therapist Registered) supervision. Translation: I will get my ATR within a year! Pretty huge deal, actually.

As I was filling out the new-hire paperwork this afternoon, I pulled my driver's license out of my wallet to be photocopied. I had almost forgotten that these perfect little fortunes had been stashed behind my license months and months ago for safe-keeping.

You will soon gain something you have always desired.
and
An unexpected windfall will be yours.

Thank you, magic fortunes, for coming true 110%.

Ti voglio bene per sempre

I started this as a surprise for Chas when we first started dating. I finished it last night. Painting is a lot like exercising for me: it's hard to get motivated sometimes to start but once I get going, I love it. Ok, well let's be honest. I don't know if I ever really love exercising but I do love love love painting. I tend to lose all track of time once I'm in the flow.
If you can't tell, this is me and Chas. He's giving me a twirling hug. Our favorite. "Ti voglio bene per sempre" is Italian for "I want good for you always." (Chas served in Italy and when he speaks Italian, I melt.) He first kissed me under a meteor shower and, like I've mentioned before, has the cutest seersucker pants and vest combo for church. The pattern in the tree was originally intended to be leaves but I kind of loved how they ended up looking like hearts.

Dear Chas,

I know that, more than anything, you just want me to be happy. But when I tried on my temple dress for you and explained how rockin' it would look with the gray cardi and green jacket, I could tell you weren't super stoked on the idea. But, because you could see that I loved it, you were happy for me. Only here's the thing, I want you to love the way I look on our wedding day maybe a little bit more than anything else. So when we were driving up to Salt Lake to have dinner with your grandma this afternoon and you confessed to me how much you adore that J.Crew dress I showed you online just for fun last week...my plans quickly changed.

I love how much you love it and how excited you are to see me in it. I also like the way you describe it as being "elegant" and "pure" and how you say that's just like me. (Just promise me you won't call it "traditional" and we'll both be perfectly happy with this dress choice.)

Yours,
Sam

oh yeah...

Did I mention that Chas will be wearing this 3-piece gray pinstripe skinny suit from Banana Republic? And did I mention that he tried it on for me to see two nights ago? And did I mention that this suit was made for his body type? And did I mention how handsome he is? And in that suit...ummmmm....words cannot express. Swoon city.

Hummana-hummana.

say yes to the dress

Today is a good day because today I made the wedding dress decision.

I've gone back and forth on a lot of different looks and ideas. The day after I got engaged, sister Rosie and I decided to hit up a few bridal shops just because we could. We quickly discovered, however, that basically everything that Utah Valley has to offer in the modest wedding dress department is...either gross-y and/or very predictable. The highlight of that experience was when I managed to squeeze into a size 0 mermaid dress. It looked killer but wasn't totally me and was way more money than I want to spend on a dress- even if it is the wedding dress.

Last week, I went to Salt Lake and spent the whole day with my mom and Rosie driving around to different D.I.'s looking for a diamond in the rough like Sarah was lucky enough to find.

Yeah, she grabbed that puppy back when she was in high school for only $12. We refer to it in our family as "the ultimate D.I. purchase."

Sadly, we didn't find anything for me. We next hit up some vintage clothing shops and then looked through patterns at a sewing store. Notta. At a designer's discount fabric store, we snagged some rad floral-patterned fabric and pretty white fabric at $1.80/yd. We were thinking it would be totally cool and unexpected to design a dress that incorporated a floral pattern along with the traditional white fabric. I started drawing up different sketches and was actually pretty excited about the potential that a dress like this could have. Still, something didn't seem exactly right. So then my mom and I started discussing the possibility of borrowing a dress from a friend or cousin. I also set up an appointment with a woman in Park City who sells designer dresses for $200ish.

But then...but then.

My mom came across this picture on the JCrew website, called me up, and I immediately fell in love with this look.

So this is the plan: I bought the velvet olive green blazer this afternoon and will probably get this gray cardigan to go underneath.

I'll get a similar brown belt and awesome chunky necklace. Chocolate brown leather boots will tie it all together and be perfect for a winter wedding. Who wants to wear heels in the snow? Um, no thanks.

And the actual dress, you ask? Well, you may not know but once upon a time I was married before. Back then, I had a sweet temple dress custom made and designed just for me and it is dah-ling. It has a fitted waist and three-tiered layers towards the bottom. It even has a halter top. But never fear- a really nice 3/4 sleeve shirt worn underneath keeps it modest and stylish. So put that dress (which, should I remind you, is totally for free) under the cardi and jacket with the belt and what do you have?? Just the coolest, cutest, unique-est wedding dress ensemble ever! And the best part (besides the free/already-had-on-hand-dress)? It's 100% Sam Card.

seriously

The doorbell rang this morning at about 10am. It was our home teachers just bringing us over the most beautifully crafted, steaming hot, homemade apple pie. No big deal.

The church is true.

mmm...

One time last year I bought a box of Apple Jacks cereal. 24 hours later, it was gone. I was a little embarrassed but mostly secretly proud of myself. I mean, come on- I just downed an entire box of cereal on my own in a single day! The slightly embarrassed side of me, however, said that I probably shouldn't buy any more boxes of cereal for a while. And I haven't. That is, up until last week when this guy caught my eye in the grocery aisle.

It was gone in a few days. Definately under a week. Baby steps. Progress is all about baby steps.

Since I did so great with that box, I thought I'd take advantage of the gorgeous fall weather yesterday and walk to Smith's and get another box of some fun new cereal yumminess. Win, win.

It was my lunch and dinnner yesterday. My breakfast this morning. And, just in case you're wondering...yes, it does work as an excellent meal at all three times of the day.

leaves change but some things never do

Fall is my favorite season. Hands down. Seeing leaves turn hot pink and gold, the tippy tops of the mountains being white with snow, and even the way the air smells makes me feel happy inside. There's something very nostalic and magical about it all. Whenever I drive anywhere this time of year, I'm always picturing little kids walking home from school, crunching leaves under their feet, and passing the pumpkins that are beginning to appear on doorsteps. I even loved yesterday's gray sky and rain. It made me ache for Oregon.

Just so you know, there are two absolute musts that go along with fall.
*Note: These are both non-negotiable.

Steamers with whip cream from Starbucks make you feel like your insides are being wrapped up in a warm blanket.

Speaking of blankets, you should always have a cozy quilt nearby. This is especially imperative when it rains. In which case, you should set aside some time to sit by a window, bundled up in your blanket of choice, and watch it fall.

Chas recently told me that he remembers me explaining to him way back when I was thirteen-ish that I loved doing this. Still do. And always will.

you were only waiting for this moment to arise!

On Friday, I had my lungs x-rayed for pneumonia, my blood drawn (scary needles!), and the longest, most invasive cotton swab jammed up my nose basically into my eye sockets to test for swine flu. But don't worry, I'm better now. Much better- on account of two things: 1. I ended up not having either pneumonia or swine and 2. something very, very happy took place later that night...

Chas and I got all dressed up and went out to eat at a fancy shmancy restaurant up at Sundance. We sat at a table near a fireplace and even ordered appetizers. After dinner, Chas suggested that we take a little moon-lit walk to a nearby pond. (At this point, I may have known what was coming.) As we stood on a little bridge over a creek, looking out on the pond and small waterfalls, he got down on one knee, opened a white box and said, "Sammy, will you marry me?" Before I could respond, he quickly yelled, "Try it on, baby!" And he didn't have to ask twice- that's for sure. With his grandma's beautiful antique ring on my left hand, he hugged me and said, "Wait- what did you answer?" Yes, Chazzy boy. Yes, yes, yes!

So the newest chapter begins in my always-changing-never-predictable-but-always-amazing life.
Read more about me and Chas on his cutie sister's blog.

so maybe this week's class was still pretty great after all

This week's class didn't feel as magical as last week's. But then again, last week's class was pretty dang magical. At one point, a girl came to the front of the room and belted out a goose bump-inducing rendition of the national anthem. At another point, we were all sitting on top of the tables, Indian style, eating bowls of strawberry or cookie dough ice cream and having pillow talk. Oh yeah, and another student brought in a Jack Johnson CD for everyone to have.

...Perhaps I should explain. I promise it was all legit and in the name of learning.

I've asked each of the students to present a 'stress soother' to the class (something/anything that helps them to relax or manage their stress) at some point during the semester. So each week we have 1-2 people take 5 mins or so and share with the class what they do to help manage their stress. This is what the ice cream pillow talk and CD distribution was. One student explained how, after a particularly stressful day, he sits on his bed with his roommates and, with bowl of ice cream in hand, chats about the day and what has been causing him stress. Similarly, the Jack Johnson CD represented that student's way of relaxing or rocking out to tunes when she runs. So everyone got to eat ice cream, chat, and be given a CD. Win win win.

Then, later on during my lecture, I wanted to demonstrate the concept of stress as being caused totally by our perceptions. Nothing in the world is inherently stressful. So I asked for a volunteer to come to the front of the room. I wanted someone who would be a bit shy so I probably shouldn't have picked the first girl who enthusiastically shot her hand in the air. But I did and she gladly came to the front. I asked her to pretend she was at a baseball game and sing the national anthem as loudly as she could right then in front of the entire class. Thinking that this would terrify almost (keyword: almost) anyone, I would then go into a discussion of how when we are alone or rockin' out in the shower, singing the national anthem loudly is a piece of cake and maybe even quite enjoyable. Thus, it is not the act of singing the national anthem that is inherently stressful but our preception of it (when asked to do so in front of people) that causes us to feel stress. Great lesson demonstration, no? Well, it just so happens that as soon as I asked the student to sing, she quickly and happily replied, "Oh, sure! I've done that tons of times before baseball games!" And before I knew it, she was off. We all just stared at her, mouths gaping open. Students applauded intermittently when the 'good parts' of the song came. I had goosebumps. And when she finished, we all erupted in shouts, laughter, and a lot of disbelief. Did she really just do that? At first, I thought my would-be awesome lesson was ruined. But it wasn't because I had heard a student in the front row say to herself during the song, "I would die if I had to do that..." So, next, I quickly asked her to join me up front and that it would be her turn to sing. And she was right- she did about die. She was laughing, and almost yelling, "No! No!" She even showed us how her hands were shaking. And with that, my lesson point was restored. Why could one girl do it no problem while one girl experienced stress up the wazoo? Because the act/event itself was not stressful but merely how each person interpreted it differently. Case closed.

So yeah, last week's class was basically amazing. Tonight, as I felt people's attention spans weaken and the sun go down earlier than usual, I decided to call it a night a few minutes before 7:40pm. Then I reminded myself that it doesn't have to be that spectacular every single week and that sometimes school is just that- school. But then again, tonight did include a 20 minute guided progressive relaxation session complete with students laying on the floor and lights turned off. So maybe it's still a little better than just boring ol' school.